He had doomed their relationship even before it started.
He had placed her high up on a pedestal refusing to believe that she like many others before her is capable of making mistakes, capable of falling apart and most of all capable of hurting someone whether or not she intended to or not.
For so long it had been easy for them to talk, about anything and everything…
He mistook the ease they had between them as something more, maybe something meant to be.
She on the other hand only saw him as a friend, a person to talk to when no one else was around to flirt with.
She never assumed that made her a bad person, what was innocent flirting from time to time but harmless fun, she never expected anybody to take it seriously… well anybody that knew her as well as he did.
He might have been looking for something special but at her young age she was only looking for fun and gossip. The thought of something serious never crossed her mind not until a much later time in her life.
He spoke to her with such passion and care, making sure he said the right things at the right time and never had he ever made her uncomfortable or uneasy.
He asked her one day casually if she had her eyes on someone… someone that made her heart flutter the way she made his, off course the last part was never said out loud he made sure all his feelings were tucked away where she couldn’t even have guessed… something to do with being vulnerable and maybe an easy target to being hurt and walked all over by rejection.
She laughed at the thought of something serious and told him all she wanted to do was have fun.
How that translated in his mind as “you’re the one I want to spend the rest of my life with” was beyond her as after that day he confessed his undying love for her from the moment he set eyes on her.
She stared at the computer screen in awe… thinking to herself thank God for technology… thank God he cant see the look of complete shock on my face, thank God I can so easily appear offline and blame it on bad connection and forget it ever happened but something in her wanted to hear more… something in her was somehow longing to hear those exact words… maybe it was the part of her she so desperately hid from everyone, the soft side of her… the not so independent girl who could do everything alone and never needed anyone’s help… she shook her head and blamed those last thoughts on temporary insanity and resumed staring at her screen.
He stared at the screen waiting for her to say something but was feeling too anxious to wait… maybe she misunderstood maybe she didn’t get the message and what if something went so horribly wrong.
So he continued typing… not knowing that the more he typed the harder it was for her to ignore… the more he said the harder it was for her to let go… the more he confessed the crappier she felt about letting him down.
I love you…
And not like a sister but as something more… I’ve always felt it…
What the hell !!! how could she have missed that !!! how could such strong feelings be mistaken for friendship… she was working her brain for something to say…
I want you to be mine and mine alone…
I want to marry you and spend the rest of my life with you… I want to sweep u off your feet and make u feel like the princesses you are… I want to love you… please let me love you…
She looked at the screen and thought to herself
What the fuck is wrong with me… this guy was telling her what every girl dreams about being told
This guy was telling her what girls her age would only imagine that someone would tell them
He was opening up to her and all she could think about was oh please God make it stop I don’t know what to do I don’t know what to say… rewind rewind rewiiiiind !!!!!
He got the message she was trying to send with her silence and typed with sadness
It’s fine etha u don’t feel the same way, I understand it was never part of your plans but I want you to know that there is no one else for me out there and I will wait for you… however long it takes for you to accept that no one will love you the way I can, that no one would appreciate you the way I can…
So many mixed emotions…
Anger for one was bubbling inside her… who the hell does he think he is !!! how could he so selfishly tell her all that and expect her to just drop everything she had and run into his welcoming arms…
Wait a minute… what the hell is wrong with me… I’m angry at guy for loving me? I’m angry at a guy for telling me he had feelings for me?
Ok… calm down you stupid child… and focus
She typed slowly… checking and rechecking what she was typing just in case she was too harsh… or too forward…
Somehow the thoughts in her head weren’t the words she typed, the thoughts in her head were being masked by something much stronger…
I love you too…
He had placed her high up on a pedestal refusing to believe that she like many others before her is capable of making mistakes, capable of falling apart and most of all capable of hurting someone whether or not she intended to or not.
For so long it had been easy for them to talk, about anything and everything…
He mistook the ease they had between them as something more, maybe something meant to be.
She on the other hand only saw him as a friend, a person to talk to when no one else was around to flirt with.
She never assumed that made her a bad person, what was innocent flirting from time to time but harmless fun, she never expected anybody to take it seriously… well anybody that knew her as well as he did.
He might have been looking for something special but at her young age she was only looking for fun and gossip. The thought of something serious never crossed her mind not until a much later time in her life.
He spoke to her with such passion and care, making sure he said the right things at the right time and never had he ever made her uncomfortable or uneasy.
He asked her one day casually if she had her eyes on someone… someone that made her heart flutter the way she made his, off course the last part was never said out loud he made sure all his feelings were tucked away where she couldn’t even have guessed… something to do with being vulnerable and maybe an easy target to being hurt and walked all over by rejection.
She laughed at the thought of something serious and told him all she wanted to do was have fun.
How that translated in his mind as “you’re the one I want to spend the rest of my life with” was beyond her as after that day he confessed his undying love for her from the moment he set eyes on her.
She stared at the computer screen in awe… thinking to herself thank God for technology… thank God he cant see the look of complete shock on my face, thank God I can so easily appear offline and blame it on bad connection and forget it ever happened but something in her wanted to hear more… something in her was somehow longing to hear those exact words… maybe it was the part of her she so desperately hid from everyone, the soft side of her… the not so independent girl who could do everything alone and never needed anyone’s help… she shook her head and blamed those last thoughts on temporary insanity and resumed staring at her screen.
He stared at the screen waiting for her to say something but was feeling too anxious to wait… maybe she misunderstood maybe she didn’t get the message and what if something went so horribly wrong.
So he continued typing… not knowing that the more he typed the harder it was for her to ignore… the more he said the harder it was for her to let go… the more he confessed the crappier she felt about letting him down.
I love you…
And not like a sister but as something more… I’ve always felt it…
What the hell !!! how could she have missed that !!! how could such strong feelings be mistaken for friendship… she was working her brain for something to say…
I want you to be mine and mine alone…
I want to marry you and spend the rest of my life with you… I want to sweep u off your feet and make u feel like the princesses you are… I want to love you… please let me love you…
She looked at the screen and thought to herself
What the fuck is wrong with me… this guy was telling her what every girl dreams about being told
This guy was telling her what girls her age would only imagine that someone would tell them
He was opening up to her and all she could think about was oh please God make it stop I don’t know what to do I don’t know what to say… rewind rewind rewiiiiind !!!!!
He got the message she was trying to send with her silence and typed with sadness
It’s fine etha u don’t feel the same way, I understand it was never part of your plans but I want you to know that there is no one else for me out there and I will wait for you… however long it takes for you to accept that no one will love you the way I can, that no one would appreciate you the way I can…
So many mixed emotions…
Anger for one was bubbling inside her… who the hell does he think he is !!! how could he so selfishly tell her all that and expect her to just drop everything she had and run into his welcoming arms…
Wait a minute… what the hell is wrong with me… I’m angry at guy for loving me? I’m angry at a guy for telling me he had feelings for me?
Ok… calm down you stupid child… and focus
She typed slowly… checking and rechecking what she was typing just in case she was too harsh… or too forward…
Somehow the thoughts in her head weren’t the words she typed, the thoughts in her head were being masked by something much stronger…
I love you too…
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