He knew me like no one else could possibly know me.
He knew what I would say before I even thought of it.
He knew if something was wrong from the way I took in my breath.
He never thought that it was childish or dramatic if I took out my anger on him, quite the opposite really, he told me he found it adorable when little things bugged me, he said it showed I cared.
Whether he meant that I cared about him or that I cared about the things that bugged me was beyond me but I wasn’t the type of girl that would turn down a compliment or over analyze it.
Our conversations became more intimate as the days went by and I found myself craving to tell him every little thought that popped into my head.
I still haven’t told him that he made my heart skip a beat
Or the fact that my palms would get sweaty when he smiled at me even if it was freezing cold outside.
He didn’t know that he was the only person that could make me blush when I noticed him staring at me.
I haven’t told him that I thought about him and that I dreamed about having the perfect conversation with him, where he would be hanging at my every word and it would end with a scene from a cheesy romantic movie where he would tell me he loved me and would carry me away along the horizon.
There wasn’t anything physical about our friendship, I wouldn’t hug him hello every morning the way I did my other friends, I wouldn’t even playfully push him or mess his hair although I did that comfortably with all my other buddies.
I felt too self conscious around him.
I would even actually think about witty comments and jokes when I was around him whereas when I was with my other friends they came so naturally and so easily.
I was too afraid to say the wrong thing or act the wrong way.
And then it happened. As surprisingly as a snow storm in the middle of a blazing summers day.
Stranger: How the hell am I supposed to study for AS bio?
Dreamer: Like normal people do… you know maybe learn something from a book?
Stranger: you’re good at bio… you’re really good at bio… you can tutor me.
Dreamer: ummm yeah sure, I can do that. Which chapters do you find difficult?
Stranger: the bio chapters.
Dreamer: this is gonna take a while.
Stranger: i LOVE you!!!! I’m gonna ace that exam because of you….
Dreamer:…….
Stranger: are you okay? your face turned red… *sly smile*
Dreamer: nothing I’m fine. Its just really hot in here… ok umm lets go to the common room and do a bit of bio before my AS chem. class.
Stranger: no no… its too noisy in there. Lets find an empty classroom, it would be more quite and I could concentrate more on you… WITH you…
Dreamer: yeah… riiight…. Empty classroom… ok
I reluctantly followed him to an empty class room in our new senior block just a couple of rooms away from the noisy, packed, safe common room.
I sat down on a desk near the door… what was I thinking? Easy escape?
What was I afraid off…?
We were just two friends helping each other out with school work. Nothing to worry about.
I took a deep breath and took out my trusty bio textbook and stared at the contents page for what seemed like an hour. I knew that textbook inside out yet I didn’t know where to begin or how to begin. I had tutored so many people before but with him I was blank, my brain was refusing to function.
And then I felt his hand slowly touching mine, he lifted my hands from the table and he interlocked his fingers with mine….
I felt a chill run down my spine and the voice in my head that I keep ignoring was screaming in protest.
I was still staring down at that page.
I finally decided to look up…
And I saw his eyes looking into mine.
The voice in my head suddenly went silent.
He smiled.
Stranger: your hands are tiny.
Dreamer:……
Stranger: seriously, my hands look like a giants compared to yours.
Dreamer:…….
Stranger: do you want me to let go of your hands?
Dreamer: no
He took my hand and kissed the tip of my little finger.
I looked at him with eyes wide as saucers.
I was so shocked, I was speechless.
I was shocked that he kissed my hand.
I was even more shocked that I didn’t seem to mind, I wasn’t objecting to him holding my hand or kissing it or even looking at me with such intensity and emotion.
I really do think that at that moment my mind had frozen.
My senses were numb. My rationality was dumbstruck.
My sense of right or wrong was too mixed up to function.
Nothing in me moved. My eyes refused to stop gazing right into his.
I don’t know how long we sat there or why we sat there in silence.
I forgot that we were still in school, in an empty classroom supposed to be studying.
And then the classroom door opened….
He knew what I would say before I even thought of it.
He knew if something was wrong from the way I took in my breath.
He never thought that it was childish or dramatic if I took out my anger on him, quite the opposite really, he told me he found it adorable when little things bugged me, he said it showed I cared.
Whether he meant that I cared about him or that I cared about the things that bugged me was beyond me but I wasn’t the type of girl that would turn down a compliment or over analyze it.
Our conversations became more intimate as the days went by and I found myself craving to tell him every little thought that popped into my head.
I still haven’t told him that he made my heart skip a beat
Or the fact that my palms would get sweaty when he smiled at me even if it was freezing cold outside.
He didn’t know that he was the only person that could make me blush when I noticed him staring at me.
I haven’t told him that I thought about him and that I dreamed about having the perfect conversation with him, where he would be hanging at my every word and it would end with a scene from a cheesy romantic movie where he would tell me he loved me and would carry me away along the horizon.
There wasn’t anything physical about our friendship, I wouldn’t hug him hello every morning the way I did my other friends, I wouldn’t even playfully push him or mess his hair although I did that comfortably with all my other buddies.
I felt too self conscious around him.
I would even actually think about witty comments and jokes when I was around him whereas when I was with my other friends they came so naturally and so easily.
I was too afraid to say the wrong thing or act the wrong way.
And then it happened. As surprisingly as a snow storm in the middle of a blazing summers day.
Stranger: How the hell am I supposed to study for AS bio?
Dreamer: Like normal people do… you know maybe learn something from a book?
Stranger: you’re good at bio… you’re really good at bio… you can tutor me.
Dreamer: ummm yeah sure, I can do that. Which chapters do you find difficult?
Stranger: the bio chapters.
Dreamer: this is gonna take a while.
Stranger: i LOVE you!!!! I’m gonna ace that exam because of you….
Dreamer:…….
Stranger: are you okay? your face turned red… *sly smile*
Dreamer: nothing I’m fine. Its just really hot in here… ok umm lets go to the common room and do a bit of bio before my AS chem. class.
Stranger: no no… its too noisy in there. Lets find an empty classroom, it would be more quite and I could concentrate more on you… WITH you…
Dreamer: yeah… riiight…. Empty classroom… ok
I reluctantly followed him to an empty class room in our new senior block just a couple of rooms away from the noisy, packed, safe common room.
I sat down on a desk near the door… what was I thinking? Easy escape?
What was I afraid off…?
We were just two friends helping each other out with school work. Nothing to worry about.
I took a deep breath and took out my trusty bio textbook and stared at the contents page for what seemed like an hour. I knew that textbook inside out yet I didn’t know where to begin or how to begin. I had tutored so many people before but with him I was blank, my brain was refusing to function.
And then I felt his hand slowly touching mine, he lifted my hands from the table and he interlocked his fingers with mine….
I felt a chill run down my spine and the voice in my head that I keep ignoring was screaming in protest.
I was still staring down at that page.
I finally decided to look up…
And I saw his eyes looking into mine.
The voice in my head suddenly went silent.
He smiled.
Stranger: your hands are tiny.
Dreamer:……
Stranger: seriously, my hands look like a giants compared to yours.
Dreamer:…….
Stranger: do you want me to let go of your hands?
Dreamer: no
He took my hand and kissed the tip of my little finger.
I looked at him with eyes wide as saucers.
I was so shocked, I was speechless.
I was shocked that he kissed my hand.
I was even more shocked that I didn’t seem to mind, I wasn’t objecting to him holding my hand or kissing it or even looking at me with such intensity and emotion.
I really do think that at that moment my mind had frozen.
My senses were numb. My rationality was dumbstruck.
My sense of right or wrong was too mixed up to function.
Nothing in me moved. My eyes refused to stop gazing right into his.
I don’t know how long we sat there or why we sat there in silence.
I forgot that we were still in school, in an empty classroom supposed to be studying.
And then the classroom door opened….
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